09 August 2010

Heaven Help Me... Seriously!

Hobbit is my test from Heaven above. She was given to me to teach me patience, understanding and temperance. She is what some would call "a precocious child" ~ personal, I will call her a mouthy, stubborn and opinionated child.

Now I know some are probably up in arms over this opening paragraph but if you knew Hobbit, you would be in agreement. Everything is an argument. She will learn your buttons and soon play Beethoven's 5th Symphony on them. She will work you down to your last nerve and then jump rope with it. Hobbit has these gifts and she uses them to their fullest extent on everyone she encounters.

I love her, I honestly do, but I am so tired of feeling like a horrible person because she has worn me down. By the end of the day, my throat is raw because she has taken to throwing a fit over some ridiculously mundane detail that the only way to be heard over her is to holler above her. My head is in a constant state of aching, my nerves are taunt and my attitude is rubbish. In short, I believe that I have somehow spawned the actual 'Rosemary's Baby' just over five years ago.

As a baby, she was so sweet. Hobbit had the best disposition and was always loving. This horrid change seems to have happened somewhere around 18 months. The supposed "terrible twos" have been hanging on to become the "threatening threes", the "ferocious fours" and now the "feisty fives"... I don't even want to think about what could happen at six.

Hobbit was even accepted, based off of a written request by her loving mother, as a child to appear on "SuperNanny"... pride got in the way of that one because I really think that JoJo could have helped. As it stands now, I have somehow raised a brat. I have done nothing different in raising Hobbit as I did in raising Peanut so I don't know what went wrong.

Peanut is a sweet, quiet, gentle, well mannered child. She is considerate of others, cares about people's feelings before her own and will bend over backwards to make others happy. I know that all children are different and I don't want Hobbit to be a clone of Peanut but it would be nice if she was... well... nice.

This entry is more of a rant caused by a seriously bad afternoon. I do love Hobbit and there are times when she lights up my world - lately though, she has been the darkness instead and I am simply worn out. Heaven help me... seriously.

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