22 December 2010

Experiment 1215.1 ~ Epic Fail

On my birthday I noticed a few things and I was curious if it was just me being pathetic or if my perception truly was a reality, so I did what any other normal red blooded woman would do ~ I ran an experiment.

My family has this condition where they come into a house and items just fall off their bodies.  I'm not sure what causes it or how to cure it, but I do know it exists and I've seen it in action.  No matter where we have lived, my family finds a location and then POOF - items fall off and they can't seem to be able to touch them ever again.  I am immune to this condition apparently because it's never happened to me.  I come in the house and my keys go on the hook by the door, my pocketbook goes on the hook by the door... things just go back where they belong with me.

In this house, it seems as though the item grabbing force field exists at my kitchen counter and pass through area.  I have suggested that they avoid this area at all costs because of the catastrophic damage they inflict.  This was met with denial and slight insult that I would say such a thing.  That is how Experiment 1215.1 came to be - I would not pick up after them for one week.  At the end of the week, we'll see if my kitchen area stays in the order of how I left it or if the beautiful members of my household explode all over it.... oh they exploded - and then some!

I like my kitchen tidy because I love to bake and cook.  If it's clean and put up, I can find it for the next time I need it (if you listen real close, you might be able to hear my mama cheer right now).  I haven't baked the first Christmas cookie because I couldn't find my counter due to my family's infliction.  The part that really has me concerned is that it apparently effects their sight and cognitive reasoning skills because they don't see it or understand why it bothers me so much.

I have photographed this experiment's end results so that you can feel my pain... and then I photographed what happens when I put things back in order so you can understand how truly terrible this disease is - I'm seriously thinking of contacting Jerry Lewis to see if we can join his telethon next year.

Experiment 1215.1 - Counters after 1 week

Experiment 1215.1 - Alternate view of counters after 1 week

Experiment 1215.1 - It started to ooze through onto the pass through

Experiment 1215.1 - Returned to proper state

Experiment 1215.1 - Returned to proper state

Experiment 1215.1 - Even the ooze is gone from the pass through

Experiment 1215.1 - The view from my desk doesn't irk me any more!
Next, I'm going to try and figure out why I am the only one who knows how to wipe down a counter... think I could get government funding for this research?

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