19 May 2012

What do you gain, really?

Source - You can get more information here as well
This week has been full of interesting situations... all of which revolve around a common theme - bullying.  I didn't realize this until I was sitting here this morning, drinking my coffee and reading my messages. This realization hit me hard and it honestly makes me very sad.

I have spent the better part of this week comforting those who have been bullied - child and adult alike. It is rather disgusting and it irks me to no end. What do these bullies gain for their behavior? Do they somehow feel better now that they have attempted to hurt another? Do they not have the ability to function without chaos so they create it in order to feel balanced? Are they just that soulless and evil that it honestly brings them pleasure to inflict pain on others? Whatever the reason, it needs to stop.

There are all kinds of bullying. Physical, emotional or verbal - they all hurt the same. Someone proclaims a real or perceived position of power and they use that on those whom they believe that they can overpower or intimidate. It could be a kid walking up to another and hitting them. It could be a person, regardless of age, who constantly uses their words as weapons instead of their fists. Anyone who uses emotional mind games to manipulate another. No matter how it's done, it's bullying... and it's getting out of hand.

Bullies come in all shapes, sizes and ages. I would like to think that those who are bullies may not realize how they are behaving - perhaps they don't know any better, you know? If they are in an environment where people behave as such, you have to make that leap that they believe their actions to be normal. Tell them it's not - tell them that they are being a bully and hurting people... and that they need to stop.

No one has the right to lay their hands on another person. No one has the right to belittle, insult or manipulate another person. No one has any power over another. The only person you have power over is yourself. If someone is being a bully - regardless of age - you have two choices: stand your ground or walk away. If you chose to stand your ground, stand still and tall, don't stoop to their level. If you chose to walk away, do so with your head high and your heart light.

So to the bullies that I have dealt with this week, I would just like for you to know that you have not hurt me, my family or my friends. You have not gained any ground in your perceived world - you have actually lost it. We do not fear, respect or admire you because of what you have said or done - we simply pity you and feel sorry for you. In your feeble attempt to overpower and dominate, all you have done is gain our sympathy because we simply feel sorry for  you. We aren't intimidated or impressed - we are saddened by the fact that your life is so little and empty that the only way you feel you can fill it up is by behaving as you do.

Blame stress, peer-pressure or whatever you wish - the truth of the matter is, you're a bully and the only thing you have honestly done is make us feel sorry for you.  So what did you gain, really?


  1. Most bullies have low self esteem. And bullying only goes downward, not upward. So to increase their self esteem they pick on someone they percieve to be lower than themselves - and hopefully (in their mind) someone who will not defend themself or take it to someone else who can deal with it. Usually if you stand up for yourself, you stop being the target. And bullying is often a learned behavior.

  2. Such a true post, well said. And I just wanted to let you know that I've nominated you for the sunshine blogger award! I realise you've already had it, but I wanted to let you know that I find your blog a happy place as well =)


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...