31 July 2010

Bullying - Some Never Grow Up

In one group on CafeMom I created this post - it was removed because it was "too heated". I put it up for a purpose - there are bullies in that group... and they shroud themselves in the cloak of Christianity. It is disgusting. This HTTS (Holier Than Thou Society) even have a 'hit list' of people that they are working on getting banned because they challenge their perspective with logical thinking. I was so annoyed at the the blatant display of favoritism that I actually left that group yesterday. Here is the post for all to read - heated or not - it needs to be shared. I have seen it from both children and adults... it just needs to stop.
I did a bit of research on bullying and learned some interesting things that I thought I would share with everyone.

Bullying, unlike constructive criticism or a simple conflict, is a constant challenge that focuses directly on a person. The target of these bullies generally feels as though they do not have the power or ability to stop it - this feeling stems from the fact that not only is bullying difficult to explain or stop as an adult, it is even more difficult to have to suffer through it on a daily basis. These feelings of despair arise due to the fact that most adult bullying is subtle and often backhanded in nature.

Here are a few signs of bullying - they could be isolated instances or an ongoing pattern:

  • Being given the “silent treatment”
  • Being treated rudely or disrespectfully
  • Refusing to help when you ask
  • Spreading rumors about you that aren’t true
  • Being yelled or shouted at
  • Receiving put-downs about your intelligence or competence
  • Your communications are ignored
  • Your contributions are ignored
  • Someone interferes with or sabotages your efforts
  • Being lied to or about
  • Being accused of making a mistake on purpose
  • The bully throws a temper tantrum when you disagree with him
  • Being put down in front of others
Bullying is not a right that anyone has and it has some serious negative effects on people - both physically and emotionally. It doesn't matter how old you are because bullying knows no age limit. Bullying isn't always direct and physical, plus the type of indirect bullying listed above is statistically more harmful.

One may feel less responsible because they bully in a group or through the anonymity of the internet but that is simply not true. Those that feel the need to boost their self esteem and supposed social standing through the manipulation and humiliation of others are simply bullies... and bullies have no place in society.


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